I think it's the spillover effect of trying too much to be professional, understanding, and disciplined at work everyday. It's also because the people I spend most of my day tend to be either, (a)individuals of few words, or (b) people who don't really have many interests in common with me. The result is that tension and frustration build up over the day and there isn't really any way for me to let it out.

It just keeps building up.

And it's affecting me. I'm becoming more animalistic, less refined. Feeling the tendency to revert to a more primal state, one where the two primary forces are reward and work. The gratification matters more. The drive to work, to study, is there at all other times.

I never was one of the quiet ones, really. But so many other people are.

Does that make me crazy? Probably.

written at 12:22 a.m.