old
design
Diaryland
; J.Gan



2009-03-19 : Delicious tears
Actually, I'm a lot weirder than you guys realize. I was forced into this artificial personality in order to interact successfully with the majority of society.

I never had many friends. Especially in secondary school. Admittedly, I did go to the wrong school, (if only somebody had said something to dispel my sadly incorrect notions of how unimportant a secondary school was to character and life development) but even after correcting for such confounders, I still didn�t have many friends.

I don't fit in well with the rest of society. The Gan who you interface with everyday, the persona who you know to be (and think of as) 'Gan' is not truly the actual Gan. Probably you have experienced about 70% of the real Gan if you are a close friend.

The other 30% is suppressed.

Society is not forgiving to those who are different in some way. It was not easy for me to learn what I could or could not say to people without having them look at me like I was made of mashed potato.

But I think I've done quite well for myself, considering where I started out, and the lack of guidance I had.

You could say that I've come a long way.

None of you understand! It is unlikely that you will ever truly understand. Knowing the concept is different from experiencing it. You can know an emotion, but you never truly know it until you feel it.

In other news, I would like to fill the oesophagus of a certain person with my neuro review notes.

written at 10:37 p.m.

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